Last year was the first year that I had ever chose a “word of the year”. In my Small Group – we all chose one word – a word that would inspire, encourage and impact our lives. A word that would help us focus better in our spiritual, mental, physical and family life. I chose “TRUST”. It is so funny how that word became so important to me – I thought it was a strange word for me but I got confirmation from God over and over. I heard a song on the Christian radio by Lauren Daigle called, “I will Trust in You”. (Funny story I thought it was Adele and I started researching what the song was called because it affected me so much!) I dealt with trust issues with my daughter during the year – she was almost 18 years old and was going through the “I am an adult today – treat me like one…to I am still a kid and I don’t know what I’m doing.”
I also felt God calling me to do things for him but I wasn’t always clear what they were. It wasn’t drawn out and it wasn’t the right time for me. However, I would hear “I Will Trust in You” song on the radio and I would feel this deep intense feeling it was God talking to me. I wish he would just talk to me clearly – I am not always great at picking up on clues. I would hear God telling me to TRUST him. He gave me this desire to quit my job and start a nonprofit ministry. Well funny how things work out but one of my best friends and I decided that we should start a ministry. (That’s another blog topic soon). I had a great job and was good at it but I became unsatisfied and wasn’t as productive as I have always been. Something was going on! I thought it was my health issues but I knew that I was beginning to feel like I should make a change.
I wrestled with God and prayed and talked to my husband. I still wanted confirmation from God because why would he want me to quit my job? I still had some credit card bills and needed to save some money for daughter’s college and retirement. I would get sign after sign from God through that one song and through conferences that I would attend – one session was about Trust. I received recommendations from friends to read books such as, “The Speed of Trust” by Stephen M.R. Covey.
So I made up my mind to quit my job and started preparing. I received a phone call from a friend and he wanted to talk to me about a position with his company – it was a company that I admired so much. He wasn’t going to approach me but when he described what he wanted – he even said someone like Leigh Christian. The two people he was talking to suggested he call me. We worked out a plan and I was able to maintain a job with complete flexibility and salary that I could work with. So what I am trying to say – once I followed GOD and trusted him – something great came along. One year later, I am still working for that company and have expanded and started a consulting business as well. Am enjoying my life but most of all enjoying my time with God. Letting him manage my life and trusting him has been great. I still make mistakes and still am not the Christian that I want to be, but I am trusting more!
I found a verse (Well a passage) in Proverbs 3 that just guided me through last year. I try to read it as often as I can – even this year. It is a great reminder. I need it. While I still think I know more about what I should be doing instead of relying on God ALL of the time, I am making progress. Trust is so hard. Funny thing is that GOD has never let me down.
Proverbs 3:5-12 The Message (MSG)
Trust God from the bottom of your heart;
don’t try to figure out everything on your own.
Listen for God’s voice in everything you do, everywhere you go;
he’s the one who will keep you on track.
Don’t assume that you know it all.
Run to God! Run from evil!
Your body will glow with health,
your very bones will vibrate with life!
Honor God with everything you own;
give him the first and the best.
Your barns will burst,
your wine vats will brim over.
But don’t, dear friend, resent God’s discipline;
don’t sulk under his loving correction.
It’s the child he loves that God corrects;
a father’s delight is behind all this.
Encouraging you to TRUST….GOD.