Reflection of 2012 and Ready for 2013



Reflection as described in the American Heritage Dictionary:  The act of reflecting or the state of being reflected.  Mental concentration; careful consideration.  A thought or an opinion resulting from such consideration.

So I wanted to CHANGE – so did it happen?                  Change - Blue Button

I wanted to reflect on 2012…what an amazing year for me.  Wow I am so CHANGED and I hope to inspire others to CHANGE…that is what this blog is really all about!  I changed mentally, physically and spiritually.  At the beginning of the year – I really wasn’t even sure that I would make it to the end of the year.  I had just had so many health issues and really just was tired and struggling.  It seemed like there was one medical issue after the other…if not my heart, then high blood pressure or blood, or stomach issues, my vision is bad, my knees, my ankle…it was all not good.  I was mentally drained, spiritually boring and just frustrated with everyone and especially myself!  I really did no reflection or goals or anything for 2012… By August, I had reached my all time low.  I was exhausted and had been working so hard.  My job was demanding at the time, time for my daughter to start back to school, the end of Relay for Life season and I was co chair so we needed to end strong… and I felt terrible. .  I didn’t have the energy though.  What was I going to do?  I didn’t even tell anyone what I was going through. It was too embarrassing! I could hardly walk – I really was having trouble getting up and down and it just seemed like I need a CHANGE physically

 I really had been focused on my physical problems more than anything and hadn’t realized that I was stressed and depressed.  I had sought out counseling and began regular visits and it helped to talk out my problems.  I really wasn’t that crazy…I had just let things build up and let everything get to me.  I needed to CHANGE mentally!

 I went to church and worked in the children’s ministry, helped with women’s ministry and even attended a few special women’s events.  I prayed… well while I was driving and often during facebook when someone asked for prayers and I read devotions sometimes.  I attended church regular and was a good Christian girl…I mean I gave my time, talents, treasures doesn’t that count?  I was always making sure others had great moments at church but I wasn’t taking time to spend with God – you know me and him…praying, in the word (BIBLE) and just focused on him.  My focus was everywhere but on God and on my relationship with him. I needed to CHANGE spiritually!

 I had been invited to go on my Emmaus Walk (Spiritual; retreat) several times but it never worked out…family sick, I was sick….always a conflict.  I asked a friend about it and she really encouraged me.  I had no idea how involved she was with the Emmaus Walk but she offered to sponsor me.  Well, I wanted to discuss with the other person who had mentioned to me before and they both wanted to jointly sponsor me.  A sponsor actually refers you but also helps you get there and just supports you through the process.  I could not have been more blessed to have the two phenomenal women co-sponsor me.  It was more special sharing this experience with them and I love them so dearly!   This happened to me at the end of August.  I attended – I don’t want to share too many details because I hope you all get to go on this amazing adventure but I had never been so blessed.  I spent time with God and I CHANGED! 

 So funny, I healed spiritually and all of the sudden – I began to heal mentally and physically.  God put my trainer in my life – she happened to be on my Emmaus Walk and we even met on the way there – God has such a sense of humor….two friends on the road to Emmaus…he has great plans for us!  I began working out and eating healthy and I have lost over 40 pounds now and feel great.  I still want to lose some more and I want to continue taking care of myself.  I know that my relationship with God effects everything.  I had so many changes in 2012 and plan for 2013 to be just as amazing!


 I hope you will reflect on 2012 and see what you loved, what you could do different and determine how to make 2013 even better. 

 Let’s all CHANGE physically, mentally and spiritually together in 2013! Let me know if you are going to CHANGE!

So repeat after me….For things to CHANGE…I must CHANGE first!



Diet – the four letter word

So I know most of you know that we could never say “four letter words” because many curse words seem to be “four letter words”.  So we always tried to avoid saying them…well I feel the same about the word DIET.  As Garfield once said, ” Diet is DIE with a T…”  I am going to strongly recommend that you don’t do any diets.


So I am sure that you all have tried some type of diet in the past…Atkins, South Beach, Cabbage Soup, Grapefruit, etc.  They all have ways of working for a short period of time but then our bodies start to scream and we get on that rollercoaster of eating good, then eating bad.  We feel like a failure because we couldn’t stick to it.  So I recommend that you DO NOT go on a DIET!  Change the way you eat, but change forever!  Make it a way of life, not a torturous thing that costs alot, is high maintenance and that you have to strain your brain to determine if you can have something or not!  The plan is easy…eat real foods – not processed.  Eat fresh fruit, vegetables, meats, nuts….this was how cavemen did it…this is how many of our great grandparents did it and this is how we can do it too!  I do leave off starches, sugars and most dairy too…most are processed…

I began in September on this path and I have lost 40 pounds so far!  I feel great, I eat great and I love the energy that I have.  I don’t count calories, I don’t stress about how much I am eating.  I just eat the right things.  My skin seems to glow more, and I just feel stronger, healthier and happier.  What you put in your mouth can effect everything about you!  Just eat healthy!  I have fun making great recipes and my family loves everything because it is fresh!  It is not boring!  I am eating more than ever!  I had to add a snack in the morning and one in the afternoon – apples, nuts, etc.  This is so awesome!  Eating more and weighing less?  Yes!  I don’t have cravings or even trouble finding anything to eat.


OK – so we all know that we always do a New Years Resolution to say we are going to eat healthy, exercise more, and get fit!  Well, don’t just say it!  Pray it, write it down, find someone to hold you accountable.  Plan it, Do it!  You have a few more days before the New Year begins so get ready, get set and GO!  Look for ways to make it happen, be positive, surround yourself with supporters, be happy, set goals…this is your year!  2013….

Thought for the day!  You can do it…just believe, be prepared, and be yourself!

It’s time to talk mental…

So, I have talked alot about physical and spiritual but not much about mental fitness.  It is just hard to really look inside or even discuss with counselor or friend.  So am I crazy?  Most of my friends will say YES, but I really am pretty sane.  I do have alot of things to work on though.  So I have been to several counselors through the years and they all seem to determine that I am co-dependent….what does that mean?  Basically I am an “alcoholic” for people’s approval.  Here is information below that explains.  I always try to please others, I over-commit, I always put others first even to my own expense sometimes.  Is it a bad thing?  Well – if it is the most important thing in my life.  I need to make sure that I look at each situation and ensure that I look at how it effects others and myself.  I am sure that many of you can relate to some of the issues below.  Its ok….we are all in this together.  I am admitting my problem and I am working on it.  “Hi, my name is Leigh and I am codependant”.  This is where you all say, “Hi Leigh” and we start working on our issues together.

from Melody Beattie’s classic best seller, Codependent No More

Codependency Traits listed below

Care Taking

Codependents may,
1. Think and feel responsible for other people—for other people’s feelings, thoughts, actions, choices, wants, needs, well-being, lack of well-being, and ultimate destiny.
2. Feel anxiety, pity, and guilt when other people have a problem.
3. Feel compelled –almost forced — to help that person solve the problem, such as offering unwanted advice, giving a rapid-fire series of suggestions, or fixing feelings.
4. Feel angry when their help isn’t effective.
5. Anticipate other people’s needs
6. Wonder why others don’t do the same for them.
7. Don’t really want to be doing, doing more than their fair share of the work, and doing things other people are capable of doing for themselves.
8. Not knowing what they want and need, or if they do, tell themselves what they want and need is not important.
9. Try to please others instead of themselves.
10. Find it easier to feel and express anger about injustices done to others rather than injustices done to themselves.
11. Feel safest when giving.
12. Feel insecure and guilty when somebody gives to them.
13. Feel sad because they spend their whole lives giving to other people and nobody gives to them.
14. Find themselves attracted to needy people.
15. Find needy people attracted to them.
16. Feel bored, empty, and worthless if they don’t have a crisis in their lives, a problem to solve, or someone to help.
17. Abandon their routine to respond to or do something for somebody else.
18. Over commit themselves.
19. Feel harried and pressured.
20. Believe deep inside other people are somehow responsible for them.
21. Blame others for the spot the codependents are in.
22. Say other people make the codependents feel the way they do.
23. Believe other people are making them crazy.
24. Feel angry, victimized, unappreciated, and used.
25. Find other people become impatient or angry with them for all of the preceding characteristics.

Low Self Worth

Codependents tend to:
1. Come from troubled, repressed, or dysfunctional families.
2. Deny their family was troubled, repressed or dysfunctional.
3. Blame themselves for everything.
4. Pick on themselves for everything, including the way they think, feel, look, act, and behave.
5. Get angry, defensive, self-righteous, and indigent when others blame and criticize the codependents — something codependents regularly do to themselves.
6. Reject compliments or praise
7. Get depressed from a lack of compliments and praise (stroke deprivation)
8. Feel different from the rest of the world.
9. Think they’re not quite good enough.
10. Feel guilty about spending money on themselves or doing unnecessary or fun things for themselves.
11. Fear rejection.
12. Take things personally.
13. Have been victims of sexual, physical, or emotional abuse, neglect, abandonment, or alcoholism.
14. Feel like victims.
15. Tell themselves they can’t do anything right.
16. Be afraid of making mistakes.
17. Wonder why they have a tough time making decisions.
18. Have a lot of “shoulds”.
19. Feel a lot of guilt.
20. Feel ashamed of who they are.
21. Think their lives are not worth living.
22. Try to help other people live their lives instead.
23. Get artificial feelings of self-worth from helping others.
24. Get strong feelings of low self-worth —embarrassment, failure, etc…from other people’s failures and problems.
25. Wish good things would happen to them.
26. Believe good things never will happen.
27. Believe they don’t deserve good things and happiness.
28. Wish others would like and love them.
29. Believe other people couldn’t possibly like and love them.
30. Try to prove they’re good enough for other people.
31. Settle for being needed.


Many Codependents:
1. Push their thoughts and feelings out of their awareness because of fear and guilt.
2. Become afraid to let themselves be who they are.
3. Appear rigid and controlled.


Codependents tend to:
1. Feel terribly anxious about problems and people.
2. Worry about the silliest things.
3. Think and talk a lot about other people.
4. Lose sleep over problems or other people’s behavior.
5. Worry
6. Never Find answers.
7. Check on people.
8. Try to catch people in acts of misbehavior.
9. Feel unable to quit talking, thinking, and worrying about other people or problems.
10. Abandon their routine because they are so upset about somebody or something.
11. Focus all their energy on other people and problems.
12. Wonder why they never have any energy.
13. Wonder why they can’t get things done.


Many codependents:
1. Have lived through events and with people that were out of control, causing the codependents sorrow and disappointment.
2. Become afraid to let other people be who they are and allow events to happen naturally.
3. Don’t see or deal with their fear of loss of control.
4. Think they know best how things should turn out and how people should behave.
5. Try to control events and people through helplessness, guilt, coercion, threats, advice-giving, manipulation, or domination.
6. Eventually fail in their efforts or provoke people’s anger.
7. Get frustrated and angry.
8. Feel controlled by events and people.


Codependents tend to:
1. Ignore problems or pretend they aren’t happening.
2. Pretend circumstances aren’t as bad as they are.
3. Tell themselves things will be better tomorrow.
4. Stay busy so they don’t have to think about things.
5. Get confused.
6. Get depressed or sick.
7. Go to doctors and get tranquilizers.
8. Become workaholics.
9. Spend money compulsively.
10. Overeat.
11. Pretend those things aren’t happening either.
12. Watch problems get worse.
13. Believe lies.
14. Lie to themselves.
15. Wonder why they feel like they’re going crazy.


Many codependents:
1. Don’t feel happy, content, or peaceful with themselves.
2. Look for happiness outside themselves.
3. Latch onto whoever or whatever they think can provide happiness.
4. Feel terribly threatened by the loss of any thing or person they think proves their happiness.
5. Didn’t feel love and approval from their parents.
6. Don’t love themselves.
7. Believe other people can’t or don’t love them.
8. Desperately seek love and approval.
9. Often seek love from people incapable of loving.
10. Believe other people are never there for them.
11. Equate love with pain.
12. Feel they need people more than they want them.
13. Try to prove they’re good enough to be loved.
14. Don’t take time to see if other people are good for them.
15. Worry whether other people love or like them.
16. Don’t take time to figure out if they love or like other people.
17. Center their lives around other people.
18. Look for relationships to provide all their good feelings.
19. Lost interest in their own lives when they love.
20. Worry other people will leave them.
21. Don’t believe they can take care of themselves.
22. Stay in relationships that don’t work.
23. Tolerate abuse to keep people loving them.
24. Feel trapped in relationships.
25. Leave bad relationships and form new ones that don’t work either.
26. Wonder if they will ever find love.

Poor Communication

Codependents frequently:
1. Blame
2. Threaten
3. Coerce
4. Beg
5. Bribe
6. Advise
7. Don’t say what they mean.
8. Don’t mean what they say.
9. Don’t know what they mean.
10. Don’t take themselves seriously.
11. Think other people don’t take the codependents seriously.
12. Take themselves too seriously.
13. Ask for what they want and need indirectly — sighing, for example.
14. Find it difficult to get to the point.
15. Aren’t sure what the point is.
16. Gauge their words carefully to achieve a desired effect.
17. Try to say what they think will please people.
18. Try to say what they think will provoke people.
19. Try to say what they hop will make people do what they want them to do.
20. Eliminate the word NO from their vocabulary.
21. Talk too much.
22. Talk about other people.
23. Avoid talking about themselves, their problems, feelings, and thoughts.
24. Say everything is their fault.
25. Say nothing is their fault.
26. Believe their opinions don’t matter.
27. Want to express their opinions until they know other people’s opinions.
28. Lie to protect and cover up for people they love.
29. Have a difficult time asserting their rights.
30. Have a difficult time expressing their emotions honestly, openly, and appropriately.
31. Think most of what they have to say is unimportant.
32. Begin to talk in Cynical, self-degrading, or hostile ways.
33. Apologize for bothering people.

Weak Boundaries

Codependents frequently:
1. Say they won’t tolerate certain behaviors from other people.
2. Gradually increase their tolerance until they can tolerate and do things they said they would never do.
3. Let others hurt them.
4. Keep letting others hurt them.
5. Wonder why they hurt so badly.
6. Complain, blame, and try to control while they continue to stand there.
7. Finally get angry.
8. Become totally intolerant.

Lack of Trust

1. Don’t trust themselves.
2. Don’t trust their feelings.
3. Don’t trust their decisions.
4. Don’t trust other people.
5. Try to trust untrustworthy people.
6. Think God has abandoned them.
7. Lose faith and trust in God.


Many Codependents:
1. Feel very scared, hurt, and angry
2. Live with people who are very scared, hurt, and angry.
3. Are afraid of their own anger.
4. Are frightened of other people’s anger.
5. Think people will go away if anger enters the picture.
6. Feel controlled by other people’s anger.
7. Repress their angry feelings.
8. Think other people make them feel angry.
9. Are afraid to make other people feel anger.
10. Cry a lot, get depressed, overact, get sick, do mean and nasty things to get even, act hostile, or have violent temper outbursts.
11. Punish other people for making the codependents angry.
12. Have been shamed for feeling angry.
13. Place guilt and shame on themselves for feeling angry.
14. Feel increasing amounts of anger, resentment, and bitterness.
15. Feel safer with their anger than hurt feelings.
16. Wonder if they’ll ever not be angry.

Sex Problems.

Some codependents:
1. Are caretakers in the bedroom.
2. Have sex when they don’t want to.
3. Have sex when they’d rather be held, nurtured, and loved.
4. Try to have sex when they’re angry or hurt.
5. Refuse to enjoy sex because they’re so angry at their partner
6. Are afraid of losing control.
7. Have a difficult time asking for what they need in bed.
8. Withdraw emotionally from their partner.
9. Feel sexual revulsion toward their partner.
10. Don’t talk about it.
11. Force themselves to have sex, anyway.
12. Reduce sex to a technical act.
13. Wonder why they don’t enjoy sex.
14. Lose interest in sex.
15. Make up reasons to abstain.
16. Wish their sex partner would die, go away, or sense the codependent’s feelings.
17. Have strong sexual fantasies about other people.
18. Consider or have an extramarital affair.


Codependents tend to:
1. Be extremely responsible.
2. Be extremely irresponsible.
3. Become martyrs, sacrificing their happiness and that of others for causes that don’t require sacrifice.
4. Find it difficult to feel close to people.
5. Find it difficult to have fun and be spontaneous.
6. Have an overall passive response to codependency — crying, hurt, helplessness.
7. Have an overall aggressive response to codependency — violence, anger, dominance.
8. Combine passive and aggressive responses.
9. Vacillate in decisions and emotions.
10. Laugh when they feel like crying.
11. Stay loyal to their compulsions and people even when it hurts.
12. Be ashamed about family, personal, or relationship problems.
13. Be confused about the nature of the problem.
14. Cover up, lie, and protect the problem.
15. Not seek help because they tell themselves the problem isn’t bad enough, or they aren’t important enough.
16. Wonder why the problem doesn’t go away.


In the later stages of codependency, codependents may:
1. Feel lethargic.
2. Feel depressed.
3. Become withdrawn and isolated.
4. Experience a complete loss of daily routine and structure.
5. Abuse or neglect their children and other responsibilities.
6. Feel hopeless.
7. Begin to plan their escape from a relationship they feel trapped in.
8. Think about suicide.
9. Become violent.
10. Become seriously emotionally, mentally, or physically ill.
11. Experience an eating disorder (over- or under eating)
12. Become addicted to alcohol or other drugs.


To be like Mary the mother of Jesus

In Luke 1 we find the story of Mary the mother of Jesus.  Wow!  Can you even imagine?  An angel coming to you telling you that you are chosen by God to have his son?  Wait….what?   You know that Mary had to have doubts, she had to be nervous about what people would say about her…you know she was unwed and going to have a baby….not acceptable in that day and time!  Her answer was….”I serve the Lord.”  Do we always accept the answer when God asks us to do something? We often doubt or question why he has chosen us and sometimes wish that it was someone else to handle that responsibility.  Why did God choose me?  I really am not worthy….I know that is how I feel sometimes.  I also feel like I am going to let him down and I will be a failure….so it is hard to accept his calling sometimes.  The angel said to Mary, “Nothing is impossible to God.”  We need to accept God’s calling and know that he will equip us with whatever we need to serve him.  Below are select verses about Mary and how she reacted.  She believed, she served, she knew God would get her through everything.  It is now our turn to serve God and give it all to him.

Luke 1 NIRV  (Please read this entire chapter)

The Coming Birth of Jesus

26 In the sixth month after Elizabeth had become pregnant, God sent the angel Gabriel to Nazareth, a town in Galilee. 27 He was sent to a virgin. The girl was engaged to a man named Joseph. He came from the family line of David. The virgin’s name was Mary. 28 The angel greeted her and said, “The Lord has given you special favor. He is with you.” 29 Mary was very upset because of his words. She wondered what kind of greeting this could be. 30 But the angel said to her, “Do not be afraid, Mary. God is very pleased with you. 31 You will become pregnant and give birth to a son. You must name him Jesus. 32 He will be great and will be called the Son of the Most High God. The Lord God will make him a king like his father David of long ago. 33 He will rule forever over his people, who came from Jacob’s family. His kingdom will never end.” 34 “How can this happen?” Mary asked the angel. “I am a virgin.” 35 The angel answered, “The Holy Spirit will come to you. The power of the Most High God will cover you. So the holy one that is born will be called the Son of God. 36 Your relative Elizabeth is old. And even she is going to have a child. People thought she could not have children. But she has been pregnant for six months now. 37 Nothing is impossible with God.” 38 “I serve the Lord,” Mary answered. “May it happen to me just as you said it would.” Then the angel left her.

Mary Visits Elizabeth

39 At that time Mary got ready and hurried to a town in Judea’s hill country. 40 There she entered Zechariah’s home and greeted Elizabeth. 41 When Elizabeth heard Mary’s greeting, the baby inside her jumped. And Elizabeth was filled with the Holy Spirit. 42 In a loud voice she called out, “God has blessed you more than other women. And blessed is the child you will have! 43 But why is God so kind to me? Why has the mother of my Lord come to me? 44 As soon as I heard the sound of your voice, the baby inside me jumped for joy. 45 You are a woman God has blessed. You have believed that what the Lord has said to you will be done!”

Mary’s Song

46 Mary said,

“My soul gives glory to the Lord.
47     My spirit delights in God my Savior.
48 He has taken note of me
even though I am not important.
From now on all people will call me blessed.
49     The Mighty One has done great things for me.
His name is holy.
50 He shows his mercy to those who have respect for him,
from parent to child down through the years.
51 He has done mighty things with his arm.
He has scattered those who are proud in their deepest thoughts.
52 He has brought down rulers from their thrones.
But he has lifted up people who are not important.
53 He has filled those who are hungry with good things.
But he has sent those who are rich away empty.
54 He has helped the people of Israel, who serve him.
He has always remembered to be kind
55 to Abraham and his children down through the years.
He has done it just as he said to our people of long ago.”

56 Mary stayed with Elizabeth about three months. Then she returned home.


Merry Christmas….Jesus is the reason for the season!


Merry Christmas....Jesus is the reason for the season!

Merry Christmas and remember Jesus throughout the holidays. He alone is the reason for this season!


Too busy to celebrate CHRISTmas…

I have a party at school to plan, I have treats to deliver to the hospital, I need to take a gift to an elderly shut-in, I need to talk to a friend who is depressed during the  holidays, I need to work out so I don’t gain weight from all those party foods…..whoa!   I need to stop planning events, and doing so much busyness that I forget what CHRISTmas is really all about.  The Bible story that I relate to the most is Mary & Martha – if you know me – I am such a Martha – I make sure everyone is having a great CHRISTmas experience but I forget to sit at Jesus’ feet and worship for myself.  I write about this a lot because I continually fall into this same rut….going full speed ahead, planning, running, organizing and not taking time to fill my own cup!  I get resentful, jealous and many other things and it is so apparent when I don’t stop and celebrate CHRIST myself.

Luke 10:38-42 Amplified Bible (AMP)

38 Now while they were on their way, it occurred that Jesus entered a certain village, and a woman named Martha received and welcomed Him into her house. 39 And she had a sister named Mary, who seated herself at the Lord’s feet and was listening to His teaching. 40 But Martha [overly occupied and too busy] was distracted with much serving; and she came up to Him and said, Lord, is it nothing to You that my sister has left me to serve alone? Tell her then to help me to lend a hand and do her part along with me. 41 But the Lord replied to her by saying, Martha, Martha, you are anxious and troubled about many things; 42 There is need of only one or but a few things. Mary has chosen the good portion that which is to her advantage, which shall not be taken away from her.

I need to remember what an amazing gift that was given for me from God – and I need to cherish that and respect that and keep it holy.  It is so easy to get caught up in the hustle and bustle of Christmas that often CHRIST is taken out and it becomes just another holiday.  CHRISTmas is the celebration of life of our Lord and Savior and we need to focus more on that and less on all the busyness of CHRISTmas.

John 3:16 New King James Version (NKJV)

16 For God so loved the world that He gave His only begotten Son, that whoever believes in Him should not perish but have everlasting life.

So I plan to read Luke 2 tonight with my family, I am going to pray and thank God for sending his son, I am going to give to others but not get so caught up in the gift but in the giving of love and testimony of Jesus.  I am going to approach CHRISTmas differently.  I am going to focus on Jesus and the example that he was to us and sit at his feet.  Pray for me that I can sit still and listen instead of always getting so caught up in serving…. I will pray for you too!  Get rid of the busyness and get into CHRISTmas!



Change Sometimes Takes a Long Time

Change sometimes takes a long time Hurry! Come on…change!!!! That was how I felt when I looked at the scales this morning…frustrated that the pointer had not moved in two weeks. It is frustrating, defeating almost. that it hasn’t moved. So, I can let it get me completely down or I can come back harder and fight stronger than ever or I can be excited that it didn’t move in the wrong direction. It is my choice on how I react. I need to review the last few weeks…I haven’t cheated (well not much….I did attend a lot of Christmas parties and did have a bite here and there but I was really good.) I have worked out really hard lately so maybe I am gaining muscle and will have an exciting day soon where I lose 5 pounds overnight (that has happened one week…) OK, so I looked at the past two weeks – wow I have been so busy with the hustle and bustle of Christmas activities, lots of parties, not as much time to work out, shopping, busy at work. Wow – no wonder that I haven’t lost….I haven’t focused on ME during that time at all. So I am going to take a breath, refocus and find some time that I can try not to cram in a rushed workout, not eat while driving down the road, make sure I drink my water and eat my snacks when I am supposed too, and do better. We all have times in our life where it just seems like we are in a maze and we can’t find the other side. Around every corner it seems like something is jumping out to surprise us and we will never get out of this never-ending cycle. Credit cards are maxed out, but you need to buy Christmas; or your job seems likes this horrible trap and you can’t quit, but you hate it; or your significant other has significantly different ideas about life than you do; do you feel like everything is coming down on you at once. This is the time where you need help – first – ASK GOD, this is the best, quickest and most healing thing of all. Next – talk to a friend – I mean really tell them what is going on – don’t worry that they may think you are crazy or you will feel embarrassed – trust me….I have been through this feeling – it is SO much better when you talk through and are totally honest with someone about how things are going with your life. One of the most important things is to allow God and friends, doctors, pastors, etc to help you…you have to accept help, support and healing. I know that is so hard and it can be a little overwhelming to accept it but just do it! It is ok to ask for help and it is ok to accept it. Sometimes people are lifted up by helping others so you may not even realize that you may be helping someone else feel better because they are helping. We all want change to happen overnight, but that really isn’t the best way. Change takes time and effort! You need to commit to it. When you start feeling the changes occur, you will be motivated to keep going but every now and again, there is a bump in the road that throws you off track. Get up, dust yourself off and keep going. We all make mistakes, we all get frustrated and we all want to stop sometimes. You have to desire the change and have a fiery passion that you will stick to it and you will continue on the course of change in your life. Write down your goals, set realistic ones, check them off, hold yourself accountable or find a good buddy to keep you on the right path. Sometimes we all have to look at a map or refer to the GPS to give us guidance…it is OK for you to look at your goals and make sure you are continuing on the path. Set goals where you can have some milestone victories…instead of saying I want to lose 100 pounds by summer – say “ I want to lose 10 pounds by January 1 by increasing my exercise and eating Paleo” Make sure goals are SMART! Specific, Measurable, Attainable, Realistic & Time Oriented.